Putting the "grace" back in "disgraceful"

It was one of those weeks that seemed like 3, possibly due to a huge "business trip" I had to do on Friday; it was a school visit out to the guts of the prefecture and took 2 hours on the train each way. Being a sensible 28 year old now I shouldn't even dream of drunken silliness but when I crash landed on the couch that evening, the clock struck beer o'clock and the hands didn't move again until Sunday.

It was to be expected, really - it had been a long week before Friday even hit. With my bag stuffed full of flashcards, copies of lesson plans and snacks for the road, I headed to the train station at the crack of dawn and began the first leg of the journey. The crowds thinned out more and more as I got further off the beaten track and out of rush hour; by 9 o'clock I had boarded an amusingly short local boneshaker that had "open door" buttons and almost had the whole carriage to myself. At this point I put down my papers and started to stare out the window at what had become beautiful countryside - big green mountains in every direction, burnt out old weatherboards and little farm trucks tootling along the winding roads. I continued out the other end of the wilderness and the train finally stopped in a little semi-urban area, where a little man in a hat stood where you'd expect the ticket gate to be.

I was picked up and driven to the school by a nice but awkward English teacher who then introduced me to everyone he could possibly find. I was left to my own devices for a while, then the supervisor came over and it was time to head to the primary school I'd be doing my lesson at. We arrived to see a reporter from the local paper there who made everyone even more nervous (or was that just me?), then we headed into the classroom and I started chatting about Australian animals to a semicircle of 12 saucer-eyed 10 year olds. It's hard to tell how it went - teacher and student alike nodded occasionally between bouts of abject confusion so I think it was okay. I tried a few times to gauge opinion but everyone just seemed grateful to still be alive; I figure they likened it more to a narrow miss at an intersection than an educational experience. Still poker faced, the English teacher drove me to the station and plopped me back on the train. I'm heading back there tomorrow for one more visit so perhaps I'll get more of a reaction out of them the second time around. I got home feeling like I'd just stepped off a long plane flight - gritty, tired and ready to never leave the house again. Lisa had anticipated this and cushioned my fall with beer, chips and air conditioning which, like all Friday night activities are best enjoyed in your undies.

The crime scene

After a lazy start to our Saturday, we went into Sannomiya and binged on ice cream (with some half-arsed excuse about how it was for a blog post) then meandered into Harbourland to meet everyone at the Brazillian restaurant. There really is no part of this place I don't like - it sits on the boardwalk overlooking the Kobe skyline and as you sit with your bottomless beer glasses you're treated to a constant parade of smiling fellers with huge metal spikes who come around and cut pieces of spit-roasted meat on to your plate. As a general rule, it's slathered with garlic, salt or both and after about my 4th steak I could feel my cravings melting away into my arteries. Once everyone had had their fill plus a whole cow, we had some fresh pineapple dusted with cinnamon, finished the last of our beers and settled up. No sooner had we got out on to the boardwalk that Colm started bellowing out an Irish song. By about the 3rd verse, the crowd was roughly divided between amusement and sheer horror, the former giving him a round of applause when he bowed at the end and the latter probably speed dialling security. We headed over to the amusement park at Andy's request and lined up for a surprisingly fun rollercoaster that he had been recommending all night.


Don't drink and giraffe

After several minutes being extremely inappropriate with the walking animals, we headed back into Sannomiya for a nightcap at an Irish pub and then said our goodbyes - a nice, quiet end to a naughty, loud evening. It's officially my "week 10" now, so holidays hit at the end of this week - you can expect lots more of this nonsense to come.