Chop socky

Based on the assumption that our final few days here are going to be fairly subdued, this weekend was the last shot out of the cannon - two farewells followed by a big day trip out to the country to continue our love affair with dressing up as historical figures and playing silly buggers. With one week to go and counting, it's good to have things organised - we can officially tick off "send boxes", "tidy up" and "walk around a supermarket in a samurai costume".

Boar 'n' beans

Chaos and disorder now officially reign, like that bit in the movie where gravity fails and everything in the spaceship floats up and off in random directions. After a very odd two days at work on Monday and Tuesday which toggled between boredom and blind panic that I wasn't going to get everything done, the week gave out and I started an impromptu 7 day holiday that I'm now through 5 and a bit days of. In that time we managed to get out to Himeji, Sasayama and anywhere else that least reminded us of job applications and looming deadlines. The gravity kicks back in on Wednesday which I'm not at all upset about; at the moment I'm struggling to focus on anything until it crashes down on me in a heap.

José, can you see

We have officially returned and I've spent the better part of today trying to get my head to stop rattling around in its socket - unfortunately taking 10 days off on the trot doesn't mean the work will do the same. Nevertheless, between bouts of fevered activity my coworkers were interested in how Guam went; they were the ones who put the idea in my head to start with. The recommendation came with an asterisk - Guam apparently isn't a place you go if you want a super sightseeing holiday. However, it is a place you go if you want to eat, shop and read your book until people aren't sure where you end and the deckchair begins. They seemed pleased we had a great time and wanted to know all about it - maybe you do too.

Leaving, on a jet plane

Silver week is now over but our holidays are just beginning - I was considering just making this post a big picture of K-Mart but that wouldn't make it past my exacting editorial standards. Besides, we did actually do something interesting this weekend, in between the usual pre-trip bouts of worrying about rubbish and using up tomatoes. In Nishinomiya there's what's known as the Fukuchiyama abandoned railway, a trail along what used to be scenic rail tracks. Nature has reclaimed a lot of it and the tunnels are uneven and unlit but despite big warning signs everywhere telling people to piss off, it's one of the area's more popular hiking trails.

From one extreme to the other

Sure as night follows day we always seem to see-saw our way between opposites as the weeks go by - slackness to busyness, healthy eating to double cheeseburgers and spending to... ludicrous spending. Shortly after returning from Fuji, we went to a Kabuki performance in Kobe which was the last aftershock in our short series of intensely Japanese tremors. A huge correction is now underway that started with a grand Italian dinner for Lisa's birthday and may end up in a K-Mart somewhere in the Western Pacific Ocean.

Mount Fluji

The past 2 weeks are almost entirely a blur, but what I can tell you is that both Lisa and I have contracted what I've christened "Fuji Flu" which causes coughing, sneezing and an intense desire to never climb a mountain again ever. The symptoms are probably to be expected, considering we spent most of the climb being buffeted by torrents of wind and rain; these dropped the temperature to a level you'd normally associate with being inside eating marshmallows, rather than scrabbling over slippery rocks 3km above the earth's surface. Once we had collapsed in ruin into our seats on the bus, we flicked through the photos we'd taken from our holiday and found it hard to imagine that it had all taken place in the same 5 day period. Lots and lots of things happened - let's see if I can't start from the beginning.

Don't quit your day job

The chequered flag fell on Friday and I roared over the line in about 7th place, ready to shrug in disinterest and start the best bit of work - not going there. This time it's going to be done in style - we've picked up our Fuji climbing tickets, our rental boots and wet weather gear are on their way and in about 1 week, we'll be wondering what the hell we were thinking. Until then though it's as much of nothing as possible; the only hiking we're going to be doing is between beer joints and roller coasters.

Grindstone cowboy

I was expecting some kind of explosion when I got back to work, or at least opening the office door to find myself washed away by a comical tide of paper. Things were suspiciously quiet though - Monday passed without so much as a rumble and then I went on a brief business trip to Tokyo and came back similarly unaccosted. I can hear the beast lurking in the shadows though, paper skin all a-crinkle. He watches me through hole-punched eyes and gnashes his paperclip teeth, waiting for the moment I drop my guard and say wow, not long till holidays.

Taipei as you go

It seems the year stole a few bases on us while we weren't looking, so now it's August and the summer holidays are halfway done as if by magic. Work gave up without too much of a fight 2 Fridays ago, kicking off a 16 day break which was for the most part spent in sunny (steamy tropical oh god do I even have sweat glands there) Taipei. Unusually enough, we were packed and organised days in advance so by the time we headed out toward the airport, we were bordering on calm. We weren't quite sure what to expect when we got there - I couldn't work out if it was going to be more like Bangkok or Singapore - but as long as they had beer and dim sum it was going to be alright with me.

First there was nothing

There really is very little separating relative calm from infernos of spending in this country and I've felt the kindling building up for a while now. Having two instant gratification-type personalities in a place full of temptations and endless monopoly money is what people in the metaphor business would call "bushfire conditions". As always, the spark ignited just as we had declared we were going to be sensible; I think I'm finally starting to understand why we love it here.

Getting away from it all

After what seemed like far too long, we finally managed to leave our warren for more than a day and spent the better part of Golden Week eating, drinking and photographing our way across Nagasaki and Hiroshima. I thought it was going to be ghastly to be honest - no matter how expensive or obscure something is, at this time of year it will be booked out and crowded to the point of ruination; you really wonder where all these people come from. However, we bucked the trend - despite almost a complete lack of planning on our part, everything fell into place and we ended up scarcely putting a foot wrong.

Obi-Wan Shinobi

As promised, we spent this weekend enjoying our seemingly neverending adolescence - dressing up as ninja and running around making sword noises much as we might have done 20 years ago. We were far from being the only adults in costume and I'm not sure if that's astonishing or completely normal for this country. Once we had dressed up, bought our plastic swords and set out on our ninja scavenger hunt, the answer seemed to come to Sifton in a flash. "Why isn't everyone in Japan doing this right now?"

They call me Dr Fish

In case there was any doubt, I think I'm officially old now; not necessarily because I bought a bottle of red wine on the way home on Friday night but because I was quite happy to have a glass of it and then stop (although that may have been because it was $6). "We'll keep the rest for tomorrow night," we said, then spent a hangover-free morning cleaning and dusting. The last bit of the bloody thing's still sitting there ready for the weekend; I'm starting to wonder if we should start enjoying our moderation in moderation, because I can see where this slow-moving rollercoaster ends up. "Was Japan good or bad?" the kids will ask. Lisa will close her Sudoku book and I'll glance up from the Financial Review.
"Yes."

Back in black (and white)

And with that, a month at home passes in about as long as it takes your eyes to move from the last post of 2010 to the first of 2011. Welcome back, I suppose, although I don't really feel qualified to be a host at the moment. We've been back in Japan for a week now trying to recalibrate the instruments, mostly shambling around Osaka and Kobe as we used to. The faces, places and bases haven't changed but it doesn't feel entirely natural again yet; I think we've spent enough time in Australia and Japan respectively to defamiliarise us with both. Our first trip to the supermarket was particularly strange - a mundane task in a fantastical world, like taking Gandalf's robe to the drycleaner. There be magic here, just not as you imagined.

A new twist on the old favourites

By this stage of the game I would have thought things would be winding down, but this weekend proves that there was a charge or two left in the ol' roman candle. With a shiver of delight, I got behind the wheel of a rental car and was reminded how delicious driving is. No last trains, no "next bus not for 20 minutes", no walking up the hill in the rain - glory on four wheels. Mount Rokko, Arima Onsen and Awaji Island all awaited, the old stomping grounds that we thought we'd seen all of. It was going to be a tinkly, steamy, swirly and shaky weekend - in that order.

And four beers, thanks

I don't know if it was the daily beers, the constant meals out, no-money poisoning or all of the above, but I am mentally all over the road at the moment; I find my mind drifting constantly. Japan is well and truly Narnia-like, I said to myself as I drifted off last night. The only problem is that rather than grand adventuring with Aslan, I seem content to sit on the couch and drink cups of tea - I tut and draw the curtains on all the centaurs and magic. Is this amazing world behind the wardrobe that few people ever discover wasted on me? Probably. Now get out of the way, I can't see the TV.

What is this I don't even

There's been a cool change this week, both in the weather and our level of activity, which is probably for the best in both cases. "Silver Week" has just wrapped up, a dual-public-holiday week that was spent gloriously far away from Tokyo and its wallet incinerators. Most notably, Friday was the Sports Festival at one of my schools, which in short is an insane version of the sports carnivals we have at home, featuring tricycles and cardboard box tank treads.

You probably still won't understand when I explain it.

Cake bus, cat bus, silver robot hat bus

Our Tokyo long weekend had several essential components. There were to be new experiences like the Ghibli Museum and the Tokyo Game Show. Eggs Benedict had to be involved somehow. Most important of all, we needed rice cooker banana cake for what became known as "cake bus".

The rice cooker beeped, cake was wrapped in foil, the stage was set. We grabbed our bags and headed out the door on the most successful Tokyo trip I've ever been on.

I think I might have just spoiled the ending.

A small town lad

You'll be pleased to know that the blog bus didn't go down in fiery ruin as expected, leaving me tapping out my last few pithy jokes at the bottom of a gorge in Nishiwaki. I lived on for at least another prosperous few days of travel, beer and in time, a desperate need to not do anything any more.

Tokyo, I'm sorry - we're just not right for one another.

No rest for the wicked

Due to some no doubt ominous aligning of the planets this morning, I had to wake up about 5 hours earlier than I’m used to and saw the sun rise as I walked down to the station. This was not the kind of thing you’d see on a Nike/Sports by Brooks/Boost Juice ad – there was no triumphant fist pumping or spinning around with arms skyward in a gesture of how much of a free spirit I was. It was bleary eyes, bed head and generally lots of things that said I don’t want to get up at 5am again. That said, I am now on a bus – blogging on one should be an interesting experience. I apologise in advance for any surreal images that my omelette-ised brain may conjure.

...BLOG BUS!